When the smart ain't so smart after all

Hi all (or wads left of my audience). It's almost 2 years since i entered poly as a freshie! wow fast eh.. but thats life.. it stops for no one... it just keeps going till u get left behind obsolete and dead.... Perhaps as emo as it may seems, many may find solace in being left behind for they will no longer be a burden to anyone except themselves. People tend to be overrated. they have been put on a pedestal of invincibility for too long that they just overlook any vulnerabilities they possess. Pride before a fall? Pride was something that they may have accumulated throughout instead of knowledge. For its is humility before acceptance and being to accept knowledge in it purest form without manipulation or prejudice against it.

The need to lead the need to perform the need to prove ourselves have so long been motivational forces. Time to rethink. Are these true motivation that is worth our effort. We can go around proving we are the best when it just take just one to prove we are not. When did Effort over Productivity Analysis became so unimportant just to move just a little bit closer to perfection. It's all about how we put things in perspective. Eye for Perfection is equally important as being productive. How do we make thing look perfect yet work effectively. Answer is being boils back down to humility and acceptance of the vulnerabilities. Then u can start to achieve both areas in balance. For most times we seek perfection we do things that are unproductive, Yet we be productive and end of the day our results look so mediocre. By being humble we can thirst and accept new knowledge more readily, Accepting vulnerabilities Allow us to look beyond our strength. Which is our weakness as all the time people are clouded by their strength which obscure their vision for they think they are too good for anything, anyone.

With this in mind, Despite having graded by a rigid and ineffective where personal portfolio are more important than student's well being. It makes it all too well obvious even our education is rigged. Providing condition where elites are those who are are people who excel in plain cold results but not their morality and principles. So much for wholesome education.

Anyway signing off tml is PBL Presentation.. zzz bye folks!

I LOVE U EC!!

Love and Romance

Hey ppl my this dead blog is so dead but i like it... it then can be what journals used to be... PRIVATE :D:D yet i am posting it here as i do not mind this being read... just not too many nosy ppl wld be great yeah?..

Anyway after this long time lapse so many things have changed.. ppl have gone from jobless to having a great paying job... ppl going from single to attached to married or even single again (not that its a good thing). As for me... I used to think that being single has it advantages which outweighs more than being attached.. then again God has sent me an angel from heaven( not many ppl my concur with me.. after all beauty is in the eye's of the beholder) This wonderful blessing of my life has not only changed me...

All along i felt that i would prefer staying single unless i found right one that really churns me inside out and i go for it... For me I m usually a passive person that prefers to be out of sight until my target or what i am determined to work for comes in sight then i get motivated and go for it...

Since i have known her actually i have always admired her candidness and ability to think in ways that i myself cannot fathom.. perhaps its her thinking that really have the death grip on me along with her wonderful personality that further strengthens it. It was until not so recent.. That really felt attracted and inevitably falling head over heels for her... Her nonchalant attitude at first was frustrating yet it was what kept me going. For i had to prove myself over and over.

Yet with her knowledge on my personal life she still accepted me as i were and loved me. This alone has made me so thankful and more assured that she is the one... although in future things might happen but my mentality is always the same.... She is the one...

You guys may ask why am i so sure? My answer is one can never be sure.. unless you Make Sure of it... Honestly so many ppl can say who is the perfect one for u.. How do you noe? To me there's no such thing as the perfect one for u... for even the perfect is imperfect in contrast to God's image. The only way is to work hard and ensure she is the perfect one for urself... This is where the test and stuff comes in.. it is over time she will become the perfect one for me.. However, she is the one i envisioned to be the one thru health and thru sickness and till old...

Of course if in future things were to happen and i cant stop it. Then it just have to happen... i cant change what i cant change... yet i can change myself and cherish every moment...

I realize how i love myself more now not because i cherish myself more or wad.. but because now my health and everything about me i chose to be accountable to my love... for knowing that anything were to happen to me would hurt her deeply...

Anyway signing off and cont doing wad i was doing...

Dear EICHIEN... Ur Loved and I Love you!

PS. when ur in china i gain weight coz i keep having bulimic tendencies while i think of u when ur not in sg.. :( hope u dun love me less for that.. HAHA

When Random ppl intersects.(lengthy post)

Hello ppl, Long time no blog sia.. bad bad.. haha

Recently i sense i have changed.. However, this change i hope is positive, been more enthusiastic about my work. Not sure why but it has cause me to over work... causing harm to my group mates... they totally have no idea how far i had speed up casting them behind.. which cause them to be such stark contrast in the sense that they are behind time while i m ahead of time.During consultation my teacher was like "Vincent, keep quiet" as i was doing the answering and they couldn't answer. It was my fault.. As prior to the meeting i did the work i did not really brief them on what i had done, that really cause them marks i guess.. now such remorse bug me.. but what is over.. lesson learnt.. if u wan to do more work.. be sure not make ur team mate look bad, for they din deserve it one bit.

On a lighter note(irony), so many random ppl came in my life made me laugh. like for example, there was this auntie in the train. After i boarded the train during the rush hour. She squeeze thru everyone just to get to the position that i have easily achieved due to the side of the door i boarded from( the dover station has its door entry on the other side.). For a brief moment it made me think that is another life lesson, Then her next action was the funny part... She took a plastic bag lay on the floor then put her bag over it(to prevent her bag from getting dirty from the spotless clean floor) :S then proceed on removing a detachable chair from a bag and piece it together and sat on it. everyone was like snickering i to have to admit am guilty of it. She then took out yarns of string and started knitting, ignorant to the reactions around her. Then started to think, how can she be so careless of wad the world thinks of her and do thing that put her in the state of ridicule. Then i put myself to her perspective the gloating vanished, only to have sadness filling that void.

We find that her actions being funny was because it was out of the norm, the norm being depicted by society. We have been inculcated with values as it advances the values have gotten more superficial. It is imprinted in us that being kiasu is bad, doing things make us look outstanding in certain ways bad. What has the auntie done to deserve mocking when she was just solving a long standing( when i say standing i mean literally haha) problem with just a simple solution.(our mrt have lack of seats, so many ppl are fighting teeth and nail for it. yet no one wants to solve with their own methods for fear of being mock.) And her knitting shld not have been something funny. i guess as many were snickering/mocking, the truth that she was just maximizing her time, on the train we have nothing to do we turn to our devices or sleep. yet this time could be time of productiveness yet we are wasting it. This again shows that how we do not value time, true the older generations have been thru more things than us to fully appreciate our time but does it mean we need to go thru daunting times of war and hatred and distrust to find that time is precious? i myself also am guilty of it, even as i'm typing this post i am wasting time... i guess this life lesson god have shown me and made me realize that time is short.. or perhaps the end is near? haha the big hoo haa wif the end being near.. i mean everything has a start and an end.. why everyone is so worried about it, not like your gonna be alone... There is nothing to fear except fear itself..and god :)

Shall end off such another retarded post.. haha. god bless

Kuanz :)

Lovely month

Hey every 1 how u guys have u been ? haha great i hope :)

For me. Its has been such a pleasant month for so many things have happened regardless of outcomes. Which i do not noe :/ hahah! i did learn many things.
School. has started and i m glad to say i have changed for the better. Although the motivation factor is still unknown :/ just my inner self wanting to start up that rusty empty car of mine. I am first and fore most i find it thankful that i have so many wonderful friends who are so understanding. So much so that they are helping me in my everyday life also. lOL!

thank god for all these ppl in my life especially some. regardless.

Divided loyalties within ourselves ( don't bother reading this post for its just a sudden overwhelming of thoughts on my greyish life)

This month has been pretty great for me to recharge although i have to retake my math module next sem.. sad to say =_= However, it doesn't seem to affect me much maybe due to the fact that why i did not pass this module. Either way.. let things that is suppose to happen.. happen. i mean circumstance in life aren't always so predictable and easy to change... i guess I'll just stand there and let each event hit me like a wave of the Alaskan sea pounding on the rock on the cliff side. Some i guess will just form me into shape yet others weaken the foundation.

Change happen fast, silently and tend to be at a large scale... for anything smaller to us it not even considered change due to our insensitivity. Ppl always say anticipate change... look out for the small detail.. for the devil is in the details.. This is true.. but how long can we keep it up? Eventually we will feel exhausted, we will feel the monotonous repetitions... building up a strong emotion.. sometimes it turns out to be anger.. while at other times it turns out to be sadness.. both being so inter related yet different :/ irony huh. life is all abt irony? or is it just that they bounce back and forth of the extremes to maintain this constant balance.

Gotta get tougher to face this harsh world... yet not wanting to let go of wadeva ability i have left to empathize with everything, everyone, and every situation. Yet it turns out why bother when it results in just more self harm.... Results of an action is wad ppl care most about... bullshit about the process being important when you just blunder this 1 time in the world it will render u useless... Empathy is something what ppl tend to put aside as they grow up.. though some ppl are always so nice... but then again issit for a reason? masks taken off and putting it on again.. all so often till eventually we forget what we really are.. some time we have to fake a smile but being our true selves will just lead to more problems... life goes.on....
guess by reading till this line meant that some have read the post or at least part...
so pardon my lengthy retarded post.. but doing this keeps me in reality check.. hope it does for others. alr gonna go help out in cooking ciaos!~
Kuan :D

once in a BLUE moon

LOL my 1 month 1 post is seriously taking effect well till it becomes 2 month 1post .. ZZZ haha anyway these 2 month have been really fun for me.. i went back for training... finished my exam.. my exam was f^ed up .. =_= I got B B C+ D+ D+ F!!! FOR FAIL F FOR MATH LOL... now need to retake my supp paper on wed..:( nvm shall revise and do well for it get it done once and for all :P i dun even wanna be in candice class for math man... LOL hahaha anyway after the 2 chalets have taken place for tis month.. it was ALL GREAT :D now to juggle my time.. training is almost every day.. and really spreaDing my self quite thin. :S and my social interaction has drastically shrunk due to the amount of time spent on turning up for training and resting like PIG like some ppl claim i am.. LOL :S but thank god i still have this group of friends that i always hang out wif and often go out wif :D so yea life ain't too bad...

All along i knew lives aren't smooth sailing... however, i have nvr personally felt it so bad that i find smooth sailing totally an UNDERSTATEMENT... I have always this concept at the back of my mind the faster i grow up the faster i see the uglier side of human.. now it has turn out to be ppl close to me.. so close that u guys can never imagine.. things so ugly that even it is depicted by a famous artist. it would still turn out all too crappy.. but this also really reminded me big time on smth. Humans aren't perfect... they seek perfection so much that they drift from it instead.. thus we should seek god.. for he is perfect for he will guide us...
As i m typing this post.. i m buying macs for my bro just coz i ate his hot fudge sunday... lol... wad a spoilt ass going around throwing tantrum and messing up the whole house. So uncalled for... gave him a good beating . but still violence nvr solve anything so i did both :D hahaha

oh shall sign off now... gonna eat my MEGA! mac spicy

Vincent Kuan :P

Free sat :D

Wow, it's been awhile i have such a day where i m free :D However, it has left me with a void to fill up with activities. Recently skool has been passing pretty fast, in fact it's changing day by day. Not the same skool i know since day 1. I guess we have to come to a point of time where ppl have to really choose their friend's carefully huh? haha. after all u dun see urself old and white headed with every 1 as ur close friends, for some are just passerby in life. Each bringing a unique event and fair share of emotion that will flood you. This alone makes me treasure them quite a bit despite the fact they might not matter to me or even reappear in my life again.
This week school has not done much except revising hardcore for exams, tho we gave ourselves a small break and go to the movies and watch some local show. Pretty ok... but i din really expect much from a local produced movie. haha. it kept emphasizing that there is not shortcut in life.. is there really no shortcuts in life? it led to me to think, short cut long cut? it all how u perceive it,as the amount of work u may put in may seem alot to you but when others sees it, it's very little just because they have put in much more effort. However, since when effort guarantees results.However, the movie had it's good points like the director i guess effectively played with it's audience emotions by having a start as light hearted story then till the end the movie ends off with a touching event. Emotions have all along been a very powerful thing in our lives. In fact it has override many decisions irrationally just coz of the emotion at e point of time. Controlling it is easier said than done. however, we all have different triggers that cause that kaboom in our minds.

oh well shall end off such a boring post haha. cya gonna go for svc. :D

Kuan :P